I Will Admit...

I use to be just like a man when it came to feelings. You would NEVER see my cry, not even close to it. I held my feelings in an unleashed them whenever I knew I was alone, whether that was in screaming and yelling or crying and being overly dramatic. Like Dane cook said “You walk into the house, and as soon as you here those three seconds of silent...and all hell breaks lose.” When high school started I begin to learn that crying was okay, and letting my guard down to let the people who loved me was a great feeling. Over the last three weeks I have had to watch someone I honestly love suffer, and fade away from me. And yes I am talking about my I guess you can still call him boyfriend (technology we are on a ‘break’.) It hurts for him to not trust me, to fade away like that. It hurts for him to look at me, and walk right past me off campus. I’m not going to lie, I hate with a passion this waiting game, for him to come around and everything to hopefully be okay soon but, something is keeping me there. I miss him so much and whenever my mind isn’t occupied with something I always turn back to him. Hopefully everything will be okay soon, and he will be able to talk to me about it. I don’t want to lose him, I love him, I miss him, and I want everything to be okay soon.

"Confidence is keeping it together, when the whole world would understand if you gave up."

Thunder,

Today is a winding road that's taking me to places that I didn't want to goToday in the blink of an eye I'm holding on to something and I do not know whyI tried, I tried to read between the lines. I tried to look in your eyes

I want a simple explanation For what I'm feeling inside I gotta find a way out Maybe there's a way out Today is a winding road Tell me where to start and tell me something I don't know Today I'm on my own I can't move a muscle and I can't pick up the phoneI don't know And now I'm itching for the tall grass And longing for the breeze I need to step outsideJust to see if I can breathe I gotta find a way out Maybe there’s a way out Yeah I'm walking on a tightrope I'm wrapped up in vines I think we'll make it out But you just gotta give me timeStrike me down with lightning Let me feel you in my veins I wanna let you know how much I feel your pain Today is a winding road that's taking me to places that I didn't want to go Your voice was the soundtrack of my summer Do you know you're unlike any other? You'll always be my thunder, and I said Your eyes are the brightest of all the colors I don't wanna ever love another You'll always be my thunder So bring on the rain And listen to the thunder.